I am posting a copy of a letter my nephew, Danny, wrote to his cousin, David, in honor of his Bar Mitzva. The letter is about my father (their grandfather) and what he meant to Danny. From the letter we can learn alot about my father, may he rest in peace, and his personality.
אני מביאה ברשומה זאת מכתב שהאחיין שלי, דני, כתב לבן דוד שלו, דוד לרגל הבר מצוה של דוד. המכתב מספר על האבא שלי ז"ל (הסבא שלהם) ומה דני למד ממנו בתור ילד. מהמכתב אפשר ללמד הרבה על האבא שלי והתכונות שלו.
October 13, 2009
Dear David,
You finally made it to your Bar Mitzvah. Mazel Tov!
I wonder what may be going through your mind now. I am sure that you are excited. Maybe a little nervous.
I remember my Bar Mitzvah well. It was an important milestone in my life. Wearing tiffilin, being called up to the Torah, giving a speech, getting gifts, and spending time with family will all certainly be memorable to you too.
I also remember the speeches. The advice. The words of wisdom. Well, actually I remember more being bored from these discourses, rather than remembering any of their content.
The bits of wisdom I attained as a Bar Mitzvah actually came to me most from our Grandpa than anyone else. He did not give a speech. He did not need to. He taught with stories, advice, jokes but mostly by his actions.
I thought I would list a “Top Ten” of some of his pearls of wisdom, many of which I am still myself just starting to appreciate.
1. Take pride in your family roots. Grandpa always reminded how Grandma came from a family of great Rabbis. He showed me Grandma’s father’s streimel, pointed to his Torah at his shteibel, and showed me his big tall imposing Talmud volumes. He spoke warmly of his parents and was grateful for their courage to leave Poland and come to America.
2. Appreciate, respect, and trust your parents. I remember one time sitting at my home’s front steps in Brooklyn with Grandpa next to me. I was about to go to sleep-away camp. I was scared and really not too excited to go. Grandpa told me that my parents loved me and that everything they did was for my betterment. He was right. The same is certainly true for your parents.
3. Be humble, but do take pride in your accomplishments. Grandpa was extremely proud of his military service. He was a medic. Once he cut his finger while cutting tall grass we used for schach on the Belt Parkway. He taught me the appropriate first aid and explained how he would treat his comrade’s injuries. Grandpa was also proud of his role as Gabbi, his big red truck that he used for deliveries, his printing press, and his strong biceps muscles.
4. Love your family and take pride in their accomplishments. Grandpa would take me and Isaac on his “rounds” to visit family members from Manhattan to Queens. He once took me to Crown Heights and showed me a garage where Shimshon and Martha kept Pesach goods intended for the poor. He had a picture of my Father at the NYU graduation he often showed me and reminded me how my dad was brilliant.
5. The biggest Mitzvah is to help others. Grandpa was always doing for others, and people adored him. He seemed to always be giving people lifts back and forth to the airport. He felt that the greatest thing to do for a person was to go to a funeral or visit a grave, because there was no possibility of reciprocity.
6. Be an optimist.
7. Always try to see the best in people. Don’t judge others and give them the benefit of the doubt.
8. The biggest joy is making kids happy. He never actually said this to me, but it was certainly evident to me as a child and later when Dina was born.
9. Don’t be vain. Always look at what is really deep inside and especially don’t judge a bottle of scotch by its label. At your parent’s engagement party, Grandpa showed me how he poured cheap whiskey into an empty bottle of the fancy kind. He said that nobody would know the difference, and that they would enjoy it more this way. He was right!
10. Be generous with compliments and with showing appreciation. I remember a huge shaloch manos Grandpa gave to your other grandparents once. He told me that he wanted them to know how much he appreciated everything they did for him. Your Grandparent’s were evidently very impressed. They showered Isaac and I with gelt galore!
If Grandpa seemed like some kind of too good to be true super hero, well to me he certainly was. Grandpa once told Isaac and I a story about how he was shipwrecked during his military service and found himself tied up with little strings by little tiny people. Grandpa was, and will always be, my Gulliver.
Grandpa unfortunately died about five months after my Bar Mitzvah. I still miss him dearly. I wish you could have known him first hand too. But Grandpa’s legacy lives on. It continues with your parents. And now, it continues with you.
David, I know you from when you were born. You are kind, caring, sensitive, smart, curious, polite, friendly and fun. Your Grandpa would certainly have been proud, as is our whole family.
Mazel Tov,
Love,
Danny, Lisa, Ilana, and Jonathan
Dear David,
You finally made it to your Bar Mitzvah. Mazel Tov!
I wonder what may be going through your mind now. I am sure that you are excited. Maybe a little nervous.
I remember my Bar Mitzvah well. It was an important milestone in my life. Wearing tiffilin, being called up to the Torah, giving a speech, getting gifts, and spending time with family will all certainly be memorable to you too.
I also remember the speeches. The advice. The words of wisdom. Well, actually I remember more being bored from these discourses, rather than remembering any of their content.
The bits of wisdom I attained as a Bar Mitzvah actually came to me most from our Grandpa than anyone else. He did not give a speech. He did not need to. He taught with stories, advice, jokes but mostly by his actions.
I thought I would list a “Top Ten” of some of his pearls of wisdom, many of which I am still myself just starting to appreciate.
1. Take pride in your family roots. Grandpa always reminded how Grandma came from a family of great Rabbis. He showed me Grandma’s father’s streimel, pointed to his Torah at his shteibel, and showed me his big tall imposing Talmud volumes. He spoke warmly of his parents and was grateful for their courage to leave Poland and come to America.
2. Appreciate, respect, and trust your parents. I remember one time sitting at my home’s front steps in Brooklyn with Grandpa next to me. I was about to go to sleep-away camp. I was scared and really not too excited to go. Grandpa told me that my parents loved me and that everything they did was for my betterment. He was right. The same is certainly true for your parents.
3. Be humble, but do take pride in your accomplishments. Grandpa was extremely proud of his military service. He was a medic. Once he cut his finger while cutting tall grass we used for schach on the Belt Parkway. He taught me the appropriate first aid and explained how he would treat his comrade’s injuries. Grandpa was also proud of his role as Gabbi, his big red truck that he used for deliveries, his printing press, and his strong biceps muscles.
4. Love your family and take pride in their accomplishments. Grandpa would take me and Isaac on his “rounds” to visit family members from Manhattan to Queens. He once took me to Crown Heights and showed me a garage where Shimshon and Martha kept Pesach goods intended for the poor. He had a picture of my Father at the NYU graduation he often showed me and reminded me how my dad was brilliant.
5. The biggest Mitzvah is to help others. Grandpa was always doing for others, and people adored him. He seemed to always be giving people lifts back and forth to the airport. He felt that the greatest thing to do for a person was to go to a funeral or visit a grave, because there was no possibility of reciprocity.
6. Be an optimist.
7. Always try to see the best in people. Don’t judge others and give them the benefit of the doubt.
8. The biggest joy is making kids happy. He never actually said this to me, but it was certainly evident to me as a child and later when Dina was born.
9. Don’t be vain. Always look at what is really deep inside and especially don’t judge a bottle of scotch by its label. At your parent’s engagement party, Grandpa showed me how he poured cheap whiskey into an empty bottle of the fancy kind. He said that nobody would know the difference, and that they would enjoy it more this way. He was right!
10. Be generous with compliments and with showing appreciation. I remember a huge shaloch manos Grandpa gave to your other grandparents once. He told me that he wanted them to know how much he appreciated everything they did for him. Your Grandparent’s were evidently very impressed. They showered Isaac and I with gelt galore!
If Grandpa seemed like some kind of too good to be true super hero, well to me he certainly was. Grandpa once told Isaac and I a story about how he was shipwrecked during his military service and found himself tied up with little strings by little tiny people. Grandpa was, and will always be, my Gulliver.
Grandpa unfortunately died about five months after my Bar Mitzvah. I still miss him dearly. I wish you could have known him first hand too. But Grandpa’s legacy lives on. It continues with your parents. And now, it continues with you.
David, I know you from when you were born. You are kind, caring, sensitive, smart, curious, polite, friendly and fun. Your Grandpa would certainly have been proud, as is our whole family.
Mazel Tov,
Love,
Danny, Lisa, Ilana, and Jonathan
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